I’ve mentioned that in my life, there’s pretty much only one person I can actually say I Dislike immensely. It’s a physical aversion. And it’s not good for me. And I know that.
But this person is coming up again after ages and is still managing to affect my life negatively.
And I’ve never even met them.
That doesn’t make any sense does it?
Let me tell you a story..
About a girl. In her 20s. She lives in the bottom of New Zealand. Living her life normally. Working, doing whatever it is she does.
She has a friend. Someone she had known for more than 10 years. From school. Their lives had taken different paths. They were in different places with hundreds of kilometres between them. But they kept in contact constantly. They had a lot of things to talk about I imagine. They’d known each other for long enough.
So this girl’s friend was having a fight with someone he knew. In his line of work. By fighting I mean they were having long arguments over text that was making them both miserable. It got pretty difficult. He told the girl about this person he knew. Told the girl the person was harassing him basically. Told the girl this person was creating drama and that he was struggling.
The girl had 3 options.
a) Support her friend, offer advice, but let him sort out his own issues with this person.
b) Intervene on her friend’s behalf by approaching this person directly, telling them to stop whatever it was they were doing to upset her friend.
c) Talk to her cousin, who for some bizarre reason was a close friend of the person, tell her cousin that if she didn’t get her friend to stop harassing the girl’s friend, the girl would call the police and lay a harassment complaint against the person.
Guess which one she chose? The girl destroyed the person’s life in one night. Someone she had never met.
In addition, she told her cousin, (who knew nothing of the issues or about the guy) that he could sometimes be quite childish and so she understood why the person was having issues with him. She then told the guy that the person he knew had been telling her cousin that he is quite a bully.
So let’s review the facts.
1. The girl was immature enough to play the he said, she said game, baiting her own cousin and feeding her friend false information
2. She was cowardly enough to not face the person her friend was having issues with herself, and rather use her cousin who was completely uninvolved, as a messenger to pose an entirely empty and pathetic threat.
3. She was again, immature enough to even intervene in her friend’s issues with another person
4. She was cruel enough to nearly kill and destroy someone she had never met. Not having considered the consequences at all.
Well. I was the person in this story. It was my life and reputation that was essentially wrecked by someone I had never seen or heard of in my life. I was portrayed by someone I didn’t know as a person who talks about their friends behind their back, and essentially crazy.
Luckily for me, the girl’s cousin, my close friend, was a lot more mature than her. She told me her cousin was stirring trouble that didn’t need to be there and that she wasn’t going to get involved. She didn’t believe a word of what her cousin was telling her.
Yeah. That’s what maturity and loyalty looks like.
That’s pretty much what saved me from making some very bad decisions in this whole mess.
Now it’s nearly two years later and she’s close to where I work. Her memories are coming back to me and I’m angry all over again. I wish that for the rest of my life I never ever ever meet her.
It won’t be a good day for her if I did.