They’ll like every one of your photos. Even the one with too much exposure or the one of the small rocks that don’t really mean anything to anyone.
They’ll comment on your selfies “looking good!! ;)” “damn where you been? :-* ”
They’ll post on your wall “happy birthday!!!” Because the website reminded them.
But when they see you in person, you don’t exist.
You exist in a parallel universe under a big blue banner only.
If they see you somewhere, they won’t be asking you how your birthday was. Or how your holiday was. They won’t be telling you you look great in person.
No you’re just a clever simulation in real life.
They’ll talk to their other “friends” about you off the record.
They’ll tag their other “friends” in memes saying “we know someone like this ;)”
They’ll use that website as an advantage. They’ll watch you. Waiting for you to do something.
They’ll use it to assert dominance. At a click of a button, you disappear.
They’re not “friends”.
I would literally rather be anything else other than your Facebook friend. I choose reality. I’m glad about that.